Wednesday, June 30, 2010

NUKES ANTS AND BONERS







He's sometimes called the tan man (or tanned man), but not the tin man.

The latter fictional character, of course, is from L. Frank Baum's book The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, and this wonderful, tin woodman eventually obtained a real heart.
This is something that Republican Representative John A. Boehner of Ohio ought to work on obtaining, and while he's at it, get a brain, too.

Mr. Boehner gave us a few bones and boners to pick (on) recently.

Here are a few to stew on (but not enough for a top-ten list):

"Will we fight or will we retreat? That is the question that is posed to us. Some of my friends on the other side of the aisle often refer to Iraq as a distraction."
(And Afghanistan?)

"The American people have written off the Democrats. They're willing to look at us again."
(Especially at the perpetually tanned man from Ohio.)

"They have called Operation Iraqi Freedom a war of choice that isn't part of the real war on terror. Someone should tell that to al Qaeda."

"They're snuffing out the America that I grew up in."
(George W. Bush and them should receive credit for that, Mr. Bonehead.)

"This is killing an ant with a nuclear weapon."
(It shouldn't be this easy for a politician to lob around the word nuke or nuclear in today's World of Terror, but when you're cute and tan like the bone man...you can!)

"The number one responsibility of the federal government ... is to provide security to the American people. As difficult as it is and as expensive as it is, we don't have a choice."
(He was commenting on funding the war in Afghanistan. I guess we've already won in Iraq.)

"We need to look at the American people and explain to them that we're broke."
(O.K., and while you're at it, say that you'll take a cut in your salary.)

"It's easy to kick somebody when they're down. George W. Bush [has] dealt with more difficult issues than any president since Franklin Roosevelt. And I've told my colleagues it's time that we go stand up for the president."
(This is one of Boehner's biggest boners.)


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!





Wednesday, June 23, 2010

GOOD NEWS BAD NEWS



GOOD NEWS:
The U.S.A. Soccer team won.
BAD NEWS:
The gulf well is an uncapped geyser again.

GOOD NEWS:
Ultra low interest rates continue.
BAD NEWS:
Unemployment rates remain high.

GOOD NEWS:
Lady Gaga is a baseball fan.
BAD NEWS:
Lady Gaga was put in Jerry Seinfeld's luxury box without his permission.


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Monday, June 21, 2010

HEMMORHOIDS ASTEROIDS AND VUZULELAS



Don't stop blowing those vuzulelas!

NASA is planning to put people on asteroids!

Astronauts (or Asteroidnuts) must go to the asteroids since it's unlikely that they'll visit us.

Which ones?

That will have to be decided.

First determine which ones have got the most precious metals.
No use in going so far just to plop down on useless matter.

President Obama has wisely opted to bypass the moon and head for Mars...
where the Martians are (though there are some who believe that the Moon's sunless side has "alien" bases.)

If the Creator and the gods had wanted humans to remain on terra firma, then He and they should not have populated the Universe(s) with so many other places to visit.

They're there and that's why they have to be visited.

For good, bad, or ugly.

Outer Space is where future explorers (and discoverers) are going...
with or without the help from any extraterrestrials.

Humans like to get outside of themselves. Out of their skins.
We like to visit new places.

The Unknown attracts.

Even when dangers or monsters lurk.

These did not stop...

Taming the Wild West... Traveling across the Oceans... Crossing the Rockies... Landing on Asteroids!

Or...

Entering Worm Holes and Black Holes!

Where there's a way (and places to go) there will always be a will!


IT'S THE ASTEROIDS STUPID!




Monday, June 14, 2010

OPIUM OR LITHIUM?





Ores of Old!

Iron and Niobium!
Copper and Gold!
Lithium and Opium!

Now there's really something to fight for in Afghanistan!
Freedom and democracy are o.k., but nothing takes the cake or puts smiles on faces like...
MONEY!

Wars for oil?
Forget it!
Wars for lithium, iron, copper, and gold?
You betcha!

China: Keep out!
You have plenty of your own mineral resources!
But the U.S. of A. needs a lot if we're going to really go green!

Batteries need lithium!
Afghanistan has lots of lithium!
Therefore, stay in Afghanistan!
Stop the Taliban!

The war on terror is now a war for copper, lithium, iron, and gold!


IT'S THE LITHIUM AND GOLD STUPID!


***

For more read:
"U.S. Identifies Vast Riches of Minerals in Afghanistan"
By James Risen
The New York Times
June 13, 2010