Monday, January 30, 2006

A VERY VERY SHORT STATE OF THE UNION

THE PRESIDENT: Mr. Speaker, Vice President Cheney, members of Congress, distinguished citizens and fellow citizens: By law and by custom, we are meeting here again to consider the state of the union. We come together here in this chamber with a lot of potatoes on our plate (and most of them are hot ones) (Applause).

We are at war. We will be at war forever. The world and the American people depend on me as your president and Commander-in-Chief to win the War on Terror. Right now we are facing the threat of a nuclear Iran whose current President denies the Holocaust, and wants Israel to be destroyed. Here we go again. (Applause)

Some of my critics are bugged because I’m spying on the conversations of enemies who are calling persons here in the United States. But I do this to protect the freedom and civil liberties of all Americans. The War on Terror requires new tools and new ways to deal with the evildoers who are poised to attack America again. I will do everything I can to execute the Constitution, and if I have to bug citizens I will do so with their safety in mind. It is perfectly legal. I am not a crooked president. (Applause)

So far the terrorists have not been able to penetrate safeguards that I have put in place. And no safeguard is more vital than the Patriot Act. It has guaranteed that America stays protected from the terrorists. More than ever this Bill of Rights bashing law needs to become permanent. We need it, it needs us, and the terrorists don’t want it. (Applause)

Many Americans still do not have comprehensive health care, and so I am asking all of you to take your vitamins, exercise, and don’t eat so much fat. If you get sick it’s your fault, not mine. (Applause)

The American economy is in great shape. Sure, you have to pay a little more for gas, but this is a small price to pay to live in a free and democratic society. Profits are good. Prophets are good. God is good. War is Peace. Love is Hatred. A horse is a horse. My kingdom for a horse!

Thank you and good night.

# posted by News from Mad Plato @ 8:30 AM
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Sunday, January 29, 2006

LOLLIPOPS DAISIES AND DEPLETED URANIUM WEAPONS

"You can't say civilization don't advance -- for every war, they kill you in a new way."

WILL ROGERS


Yes, in war don't expect lollipops and daisies.

Each side, each enemy, will use whatever weapon can produce the most success in killing the other enemy.
Mustard gas.
Atomic Bombs.
Naplalm.
Agent Orange.
Depleted Uranium Weapons.
Nobody likes war.
But in a war you must support your side.
Either win or lose.
For better or worse.
Winning supersedes morals.
The end justifies the means.
NOT ALLOWED: subjective, emotional value judgments such as "I believe that using DU weapons is immoral." (But necessary)

Although there is no absolute certainty or convincing scientific evidence that these Depleted Uranium weapons have produced the thousands and thousands and thousands of injuries and illnesses in Iraqi citizens and U.S. soldiers...still, there is the question of why these illnesses and injuries exist.

The effects strongly suggest that DU is the cause.
Question and doubt this until Doomsday.
Assert that land mines and cars are more dangerous than DU.

Say that these cancers, birth defects, and illnesses are caused by something else; or that no one knows for sure why they exist.
Use jargon and arguments from logic and philosophy.

The sicknesses and illnesses remain. And continue.
The tragedy has already occurred.
GOOD AMERICANS like GOOD GERMANS must accept what their Government dictates.
Whine and writhe, complain and criticize…it’s us or them.
But as Pogo once said,
“We have met the enemy and he is us.”

Monday, January 23, 2006

HARRY BELAFONTE AND A BAD MOON RISING

Alright...Enough of my Bush bashing and satire...but
NOT YET.
Maybe after George W. Bush leaves the White House.
After listening to Harry Belafonte talking with Wolf Blitzer tonight, I found myself sadly agreeing with Mr. Belafonte.
It was scary.
It is scary!
Not the fact that Mr. Belafonte said what he said, but that what he said had a RING OF TRUTH.
I know that millions of Pakistanis now have joined a world jihad against America.
I do not deny that this is the case, nor do I deny that IT IS dangerous.
IT IS DANGEROUS.
IT IS GETTING MORE DANGEROUS BY THE HOUR.
But the danger is not only the fact that large numbers of the Islamic community are protesting and joining this jihad.
The danger, my friends, is that America will not open its collective orbs and minds to admit that the jihad is bigger now than ever because of the bellicose and lethal actions that have been waged in the name of Democracy in the Global War on Terror.
Harry Belafonte does not mince words.
He is calling George W. Bush a Terrorist.
Is the Terror outside of America real?
Yes it is.
Has America done any terrorizing?
Mr. Belafonte says yes...emphatically!
Mr. Belafonte points out such things as torture and the collateral-damage-murder of innocent men, children and women by the United States.
A bad moon is rising.
A BAD MOON HAS BEEN RISING SINCE 9/11.
I am more afraid now of the terrorists than before September 11, 2001.
George W. Bush has been spreading something, but it hasn't been Democracy.
What should we do?
What will we do?
Jesus help us!

Sunday, January 22, 2006

A RANCH IS NOT A PLANTATION

"George and I live on a ranch. Well, we do not exactly live there, but we vacation there a lot.
So I know the difference between a plantation and a ranch."
"George and I also do not support (nor will we ever have any) slaves (except for the American people who faithfully pay their taxes to bankroll us and the Iraq war)."
"And so the former First Lady was quite out of line when she called the GOP a plantation. There are no slaves in this fine party (except for the lobbyists who we pay)."
The Republican party ended slavery a long time ago."
"Plantations are a thing of the past. To use such language is a racist anachronism."
"Well, thank you. I must get ready to return to the old plant...I mean the ranch. Toodle-doo."

Friday, January 20, 2006

OSAMA SPEAKS

"O.K. Mr. President. We are ready to start taping."
"Is this guy who's going to do Osama's voice the best we could find?"
"Yes, Mr. President. We have thoroughly mapped his DNA and brain physiology, and we've done a computer analysis of voice characteristics. We feel that we have a surrogate who is a near identical match."
"Good. Let's get started.
"The script calls for Osama to talk about attacking Americans in their backyards.
Limiting threats to the main arteries of cities, or the cities themselves, does not produce the same fear as telling citizens that they are not safe in their own homes and backyards."
"We also want Osama to say that Americans want their President to pull troops out of Iraq.
This will pull anti-war factions to my side after the recent killing of innocent women and children in Pakistan. Plus, this new tape should get American citizens on my side to continue spying on all of them."
"Osama then becomes the hated and evil one, and my authority rises to higher expectations. My poll numbers should also go up. Remember how my approval ratings got a lift (just before the last election?) when we brought Osama out of his cave?
"Yes sir, Osama is our boy...Osama is our toy."
"We don't want the peaceniks and opposition to have any opportunity to discover or uncover our operation, and so no video of Osama's...I mean the surrogate's face will be shown."
"O.K. Gentleman. I have to get back to my surveillance work. You wouldn't believe what Americans talk about!"

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

COSMIC DUST BUSTER

The Cosmic Dust has landed!
The Stardust spacecraft has returned to Earth after seven years of gathering stardust.
What will the dust tell us?
How many atoms can dance on the head of an angel?
Were humans deposited in such dust billions of years ago?
Is our DNA in the cosmic dust?
Hold on to your hats and get ready to find out in the coming months.

Monday, January 16, 2006

DEMOCRACY IS MESSY AND EXPENSIVE

"What we do know about this pervasive wiretapping virtually compels the conclusion that the President of the United States has been breaking the law repeatedly and persistently."
"This Administration has come to power in the thrall of a legal theory that aims to convince us that this excessive concentration of presidential authority is exactly what our Constitution intended."


Al Gore, Former Vice-President of the United States, 2-16-2006


Keep paying those taxes!
George W. Bush has your number!
The buck won't stop at his desk, because that buck and two trillion (or MORE!) is the price tag for his Iraq war:

"In a paper presented to this week’s Allied Social Sciences Association annual meeting in Boston MA., Harvard budget expert Linda Bilmes and Columbia University Professor and Nobel Laureate Joseph E. Stiglitz calculate that the war is likely to cost the United States a minimum of nearly one trillion dollars and potentially over $2 trillion."

The War President doesn't work on the cheap. HE DEFINITELY IS SPENDING CAPITAL:

YOUR CAPITAL!


Thousands of American soldiers have been wounded, thousands and thousands and thousands of Iraqi civilians have been killed, and over two-thousand American soldiers have been killed.

The President isn't too bothered by these figures.
Like his Secretary of War Donald Rumsfeld, the War President probably believes that "Democracy is messy."

But don't worry. If the Democrats win in 2008, our taxes will increase so that Dubya's folly gets paid off.

Democracy!
Iraq!
What a mess!

OXYMORON OF OXYMORONS

Imagine your house getting bombed by another country's military.
Imagine that all members of your family (including you) are killed.
The United States is again using its military intelligence (Oxymoron of oxymorons)!
The U.S. thought it was bombing Osama bin Laden's top lieutenant Ayman al-Zawahri.
But oops! He wasn't there.
But innocent women and children were.
"The strike left three homes hundreds of yards apart in ruins. People in the area said the blasts could be felt miles away."
"Doctors told the AP that at least 17 people died, including women and children, but residents put the death toll at more than 30." (MercuryNews.com)
Now, citizens in Pakistan are loudly protesting this attack.
Can we blame them? The U.S. is becoming more and more like terrorists that it is hunting for.
It's shameful and criminal! But, we are the good guys in the white hats who are fighting for peace, freedom and democracy!
And The American way!
How violent and ruthless it can be!

Sunday, January 15, 2006

DEATH

My theory about death bothers others.

My theory is as follows:
Death usually comes about from one of the following:

1. Heart attack/Heart failure

2. Cancer

3. Automobile accidents

Yes, there is drowning, electrocution, asphixiation, gunshots etc.
But the top three causes are listed above.
Sorry about the grim truth, but it won't kill you...
well, I guess it will.

Saturday, January 14, 2006

VISIT TO A SMALL ICE DWARF

"Just as a Chihuahua is still a dog, these ice dwarfs are still planetary bodies." Dr. Alan Stern, Southwest Research Institute

Pluto.
Not the Disney dog.
An ice dwarf and outer most planet of our solar system.
Ice dwarves are more common than rocky inner worlds such as Mercury and Earth.
Again, earth is unique...at least in this solar system.
The spacecraft will be launched on Tuesday.
Its initial velocity will be 36,000 miles per hour.
It will pass the moon in 9 hours and reach Jupiter in 13 months.
Earth's denizens will know more about Pluto in 2015 when the mission called New Horizons gets close to Pluto and its three satellites.
Maybe dogs will be found there.

WORLD'S TOP 10 THREATS

1. Arnold Schwarzenegger on a Motorcycle
2. George W. Bush
3. Dick Cheney
4. Condoleeza Rice on a Mushroom Cloud
5. Karl Rove
6. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
7. Pat Robertson
8. Super Storms
9. Bird Flu
10. Al-Qaeda.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

GAS WARS AND ALTERNATIVE ENERGY

I can remember way back during the Carter administration the talk about developing alternative energy sources. Other administrations did a lot of talking about it, too.

Then there was Clinton. (His own energy was certainly not conserved while he was in the Oval Office.)


America has kept up the talk for decades about developing alternatives to the voracious appetites of the consumer and the owners for petroleum. But all of this talk has been for naught. It was all a lie. It was all JUST TALK!

The United States should have already arrived at a solution for its excessive dependence upon petroleum. The profits, however, were (and are) more important than peace and health.
The Iraq war, President Bush has reminded us a couple of times in the past few weeks, was not about oil. Right. And Florida is not about tourism or oranges.

The peace and tranquility of the planet is now threatened because the U.S. still can not smell the coffee (not oil)... because its fat proboscis is filled with the vapors of petroleum!


I read many years ago how the major automobile corporations were not willing to replace their car blocks with anything that did not run off of gasoline. They (the car companies) could have started making the transformation YEARS AGO, but they, along with the corporate petroleum owners (here and abroad), were making too much money to go in the direction of alternative energy sources.

Thus, we have ourselves in the noose of wars (with or without terrorism) because we, and other nations, are battling for the land with the most oil.

It is laughable and absurd for anyone to believe President Bush when he says that the Iraq war is not at least in part a war about strategic (and national security) concerns for obtaining the black gold!


Americans will have to choke on the gas fumes and out-of this-world prices at the gas pump before they will wake up. Or, maybe not. Maybe we will continue to pay whatever it costs to keep running our
gaseous machines. Maybe we will tolerate the trillions of dollars we spend for wars (and the lives sacrificed) as long as we can continue to have our petroleum!

Sunday, January 08, 2006

SOME WORDS FROM HELL

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and so do we." George W. Bush, August 5, 2004

Well, we're here in Hell now so we have to do the best we can.
My critics believe that it was wrong to go to Hell, and I understand that, but we must put out the fires here or they will spread to the Homeland.
It is better to to defeat Evil here in Hell than to defend ourselves at home.
I know that Satan wants to hurt Americans. He is Terrorist numero uno. But as long as I am your commander-in-chief, Satan will not win under my watch. (Speaking of watch, what time is it?)
The United States will stand down in Iraq as soon as Iraqis can stand on their own.
It's a hell of a fight because we are in Hell!
If I have to torture, then I will torture. If I have to spy, then I will spy.
As your president I have your welfare at heart. Nobody in Hell is going to tell me how to be president. They can go to Hell...whoops, we're already in Hell.
O.K. I have to get back to Crawford. It's my one little spot of Heaven to get away from this Hell.

Friday, January 06, 2006

ON PAT ROBERTSON

Pat Robertson.
Have you taken a close look at his head?
What went wrong with this noggin?
If any head might ever be that of an evil alien, Pat Robertson takes the cake.
The brain?
This palace of the soul is a steaming cesspool, and a large serpent is writhing within its grey matter and spitting out of Robertson's mouth foul and sulphurous words.
This is one very deranged dude.
God ought to stop returning his phone calls, and people watching Robertson should do the same.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

ALLAH IS GREAT! I AM CRAZY! BOMB IRAN!

My name is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
As you know, I am now the world's number one vato loco.
I am saying asinine things to get the U.S. so mad that they will start a war with my nation.
That is why I am denying the Holocaust.
That is why I am encouraging Israel to be destroyed.
Boy, am I a big, stupid idiot or what?
So, Iran shall continue its Nuclear Power Plant programs.
Yes, we want our nukes too.
If Israel, Pakistan, China, Russia, India, France, Great Britain and the United States [Have I forgotten anyone?] can have their Nuclear Bombs, then Iran should be able to have them too.
Go ahead Neo-Cons!
Follow your leader and bomb Iran!
I am ready for Armageddon!
Allah is Great!
I am crazy!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

OUT OF THE FIRE IN IRAQ AND INTO THE HELL OF IRAN


Kissinger: Don’t Exclude Military Action Against Iran if Negotiations Fail


"Former Secretary of State Henry A. Kissinger, in a wide-ranging discussion of foreign-policy issues, says he is disturbed at the possibility that Iran will develop nuclear weapons know-how if current negotiations to stem Tehran’s nuclear program fail. In fact, he says, Iran’s program is more worrisome than the crisis over North Korea’s nuclear weapons."
"He says that if Iran secures nuclear weapons, nonproliferation may cease to be a “meaningful policy, and then we live in a world of multiple nuclear centers. And then we’d have to ask ourselves what the world would look like if the [terrorist] bombs in London [on July 7] had been nuclear and 100,000 people had been killed.” Asked if he favored military action against Iran if diplomacy failed, he says, “I’m not recommending it but, on the other hand, it is a grave step to tolerate a world of multiple nuclear weapons centers without restraint. I’m not recommending military action, but I’m recommending not excluding it.”

Kissinger was interviewed by Bernard Gwertzman, consulting editor of cfr.org, on July 14, 2005.


"It (the Bush administration) has no aims other than more oil and gas because Cheney had a study done about a year ago, that by the year 2020 the entire world would be practically out of fossil fuels. They're going to grab all of it and the biggest supply is in the Caspian area and all those countries whose names end in 'stan'. That's what our eye is on."
GORE VIDAL, December 34, 2003


"Intelligence and military sources in the United States and abroad are reporting on various factors that indicate a U.S. military hit on Iranian nuclear and military installations, that may involve tactical nuclear weapons, is in the final stages of preparation."
"In a counter-attack, Iran would immediately launch its Shahab I and II missiles at the U.S. Green Zone in Baghdad, the Al Udeid airbase in Qatar, the US Navy base in Bahrain, Camp Doha base in Kuwait, Al Seeb airbase in Oman, Baghdad International Airport, the U.S. base in Kandahar, Afghanistan. Iran would also launch its long-range Shahab III missiles on the Israeli cities of Tel Aviv, Haifa, Beersheba, Eilat, and the Israeli nuclear complex at Dimona. Iranian missiles would also be launched at US naval ships in the Persian Gulf and oil installations in Saudi Arabia and Kuwait."
"The virtual end of NATO as a viable defense organization may also result from an attack that will drive a final wedge between Washington and Europe. And China may elect to respond financially and militarily against the United States since Iran is China's second largest source of imported Middle East oil after Saudi Arabia and plans to use an Iranian terminal for the export of natural gas from Turkmenistan. [China now imports 60 percent of its oil needs, and Iran represents 17 percent of those imports]."
Intelligence Indications And Warnings Abound On Bush Iran Military Strike, Wayne Madsen, rense.com, 1-3-06


"Both (Charles) Krauthammer and (Zbigniew) Brzezinski represent the core constituencies that are running the country and setting its policy. Their debate informs us, that the question of “regime change” in Iran has already been settled; the only questions remaining are “when, and by what method?”
"These developments should alert the world to the fact that Iran needs help. Those nations who grasp the urgency of the situation should be considering military aid. (be that conventional weaponry or WMD) Iran should be provided with the wherewithal to defend itself against the likelihood of attack. Instead, the UN is more concerned with negotiating the requirements of a "trigger mechanism" with the US; a mechanism that will be used to justify US military action against Iran."
"Once again the UN is assuming its traditional role as fig leaf for American warmongering."
"It is clear, by the rhetorical battle being waged in American newspapers that Iran is in imminent danger. Leaders who still value the notion of national sovereignty (as well as regional peace) should assist Iran in creating a viable and visible deterrent to further US aggression. By now, all should recognize that the US war machine will not be deterred by good intentions and lofty language. Weaponry alone will decide who prevails in the Iran. We don’t need another Iraq."
Shifting the War to Iran, Mike Whitney,www.globalpolicy.org, July 29, 2004

Monday, January 02, 2006

BUSH FIRES

What will George W. Bush do in 2006, 2007 and 2008?
What will the apparatus of his dictatorial-like administration conger in order for him to continue to elude and delude the American public?
Bush's defensive-offense began before Christmas.
His domestic spying is on the front burner and he wants the fire extinguished.
The New York Times might have foiled the 2004 election of George W. Bush if it had informed the voting public about his spying prior to the election.
More and more it seems that American media are paid pawns who pander in favor of the authoritarianism of the Burning Bush.
Blowhards such as Limbaugh, Coulter and Hannity claim that the Burning Bush is innocent and good. These Republican shills still deny the mistake of the Iraq war and ignore and deny the fake reasons for the invasion.
Even Bush admits it (sort of).
He must show some Christian contrition for his inept and iniquitous war.
Fire and Rain.
Which of these will be the stronger force for the Burning Bush this year?
Stay tuned and get involved.