MAGIC MUSHROOMS

Hurricane winds were blowing.

 Trees were being stripped of their branches.

  Telephone poles were falling down like bowling pins, and wires were writhing and sizzling in the wind.

On this night I was tripping on mescaline for the first and last time.

*

I had just come out of a telephone booth where I had attempted to call a former significant other.

No one answered.

*

I was about twenty-five feet away when I saw the same telephone booth shoot off of the ground like a rocket.

Here today gone tomorrow.

I felt wonderful that windy night in Boulder.

But I want to write about Magic Mushrooms , and not about my experience with the Peyote plant.

*

For a few weeks I tried taking some tranquilizers that had been prescribed to me by a doctor at the university.

I was always nervous.

I didn’t drink alcohol, and wasn’t smoking pot or cigarettes.

Perhaps if I had done one of these things I might not have been so nervous.

But I stopped using the tranquilizers.

I didn’t feel much different when I used them.

So I just stayed nervous.

*

In my early twenties I became a vegetarian for a year.

I still wasn’t smoking pot or drinking, but I did start rolling my own cigarettes from

.

 

 

I enjoyed rolling and then smoking the tobacco.

 

I liked the flavor and aroma of the tobacco, which wasn't at all like commercial cigarettes.

 

It wasn't until I left the United States that I started smoking packaged cigarettes.

 

That was in 1977.

I didn't stop smoking until 2002, but I still like the aroma of real tobacco (not second-hand smoke!).

*

 

 

 

(Reuters) - The world's first clinical trial designed to explore using a hallucinogen from magic mushrooms to treat people with depression has stalled because of British and European rules on the use of illegal drugs in research.

Magic mushrooms isn’t good news for pharmaceutical companies that make tons and tons of anti-depressants from which they make billions and billions of dollars.

 

*
 

Just as marijuana is a threat to the manufacture and sales of tranquilizers, magic mushrooms would threaten the profitable manufacture of antidepressants.

There are dozens of different kinds of antidepressants.

Take your pick.

Or rather, let your doctor pick one or two for you.

 

Or wait for magic mushrooms to become legal, if you can tolerate being depressed that long!

IT’S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IF YOU WERE A GOAT OR TORTOISE

 

If you were a goat, and you were stolen, where would you go?

Home? 

(That is, to a petting zoo).

To an open field to graze?

 (Do goats graze, or do they just eat junk and everything else that they can find?)

A bar?

The correct answer is the last one.

A bar.

Goats drink beer and whisky when they’re not eating delicious tin cans and weeds.

Just ask Shirley

 (Which we will in a moment).

If you were a tortoise, and you were stolen, where would you go?

The local bar?

The pool?

An elevator?

The last one is again the correct answer.

A tortoise likes to go places, and wants to get ahead and go up in life, and what better place to go up than inside an elevator?

Just ask Cashew (and we shall in a moment), he’s the missing tortoise that was found inside the elevator.

In a not so very related story (except that the setting was a zoo), there was an Easter egg hunt in Seattle that turned violent.

It’s too bad that Shirley and Cashew hadn’t gone to this Easter egg hunt---instead of a bar and elevator---they might have thwarted the fight which occurred "when one woman reportedly pushed a child aside as her own child was scrambling toward some brightly colored eggs."

Police say the two mothers began fighting and had to be separated three or four times. The fisticuffs left one woman with a bloody nose.

Let’s now hear what Shirley and Cashew have to say about their experiences before we turn our attention to the two fighting, female eggheads:

Reporter:

Welcome Shirley and Cashew.

Shirley and Cashew:

Thank you.

REPORTER:

Shirley, what were you doing at the time that you were stolen at the zoo?

Shirley:

Well, as usual, I was chewing my cud, and looking for more stuff to chew.

Reporter:

O.K.

And Cashew, what were you doing when you were found inside the elevator?

Cashew:

I was on my way up.

Reporter:

O.K.

And where was it you were going when you were going up?

Cashew:

I don’t know.  I just wanted to go up.

Reporter:

Is it true that both of you are planning to take an elevator up to a bar later today?

Shirley and Cashew:

You bet we are.

We’ve become best buddies, and plan to celebrate.

Hey, why are those two women over there fighting over that egg?

Reporter:

I don’t know, but we’re going to find out.

 Shirley and Cashew, thank you for your time.

Shirley and Cashew:

You’re quite welcome!


 

IT’S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!


*
 

Goat that walked into Mont. bar was taken from zoo

The Associated PressAssociated Press

Posted: 04/04/2013 07:51:13 AM MDT

 

BUTTE, Mont.—So the goat that walked into a Montana bar last weekend ... was stolen from a petting zoo.

Fairmont Hot Springs Resort general manager Steve Luebeck says staffers knew the goat was missing but didn't realize it had been stolen until they saw a story in The Montana Standard on Wednesday reporting that a goat had been taken into a Butte bar early Sunday.

The pygmy goat, named "Shirley, was returned to the resort's petting zoo.

Luebeck tells The Standard ( http://bit.ly/11rcGB5) he has never had an animal stolen from the zoo, which has goats and miniature horses. He says zoo managers would like to know who took the animal so they can press charges.

Iowa museum finds missing tortoise in elevator

The Associated PressAssociated Press

Posted: 04/04/2013 06:23:57 PM MDT

DUBUQUE, Iowa—An 18-pound African leopard tortoise who went missing from an Iowa museum has been found alive in an elevator in the building.

KWWL-TV (http://bit.ly/Zb7sED) reports that officials at the National Mississippi River Museum & Aquarium in Dubuque believe the tortoise named Cashew was stolen, but that the thief quietly returned the animal.

The museum says a visitor found Cashew on the elevator floor Thursday. She appears to be in good health.

The museum discovered Cashew was missing Tuesday from an exhibit with a 4-foot glass wall. Museum officials suspected she was taken as a prank or to sell.

Museum officials are reviewing surveillance video to try to figure out exactly what happened and find a possible suspect.

Easter egg hunt at Seattle zoo turns violent

The Associated PressAssociated Press

Posted: 04/01/2013 06:21:09 PM MDT

SEATTLE—One of usually peaceful springtime rituals of childhood—the Easter egg hunt—turned nasty at the Woodland Park Zoo in Seattle.

Blame the moms.

A statement on the Seattle Police Department blotter Monday says the "hard-boiled tale" began Sunday afternoon, "when one woman reportedly pushed a child aside as her own child was scrambling toward some brightly colored eggs."

Police say the two mothers began fighting and had to be separated three or four times. The fisticuffs left one woman with a bloody nose.

Only one mother was still there when officers arrived. She said she wasn't interested in pursuing charges against her attacker.

As the release puts it, that left officers without "any info that could crack the case."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SHAKESPEARE NORTH KOREA AND THE LOUISVILLE SLUGGER

 

 

It never fails that there is always one more deranged “leader” around the corner, or in this case, across the world, who’s shooting his mouth off about blowing up somebody, and in this case, the U.S.A.

If war weariness is what you want, just go to Iraq and Afghanistan, or Syria. 

I’m saying this to the pudgy dictator, Kim Jong un.

He needs a big dose of war weariness to cool his bellicose jets, and throw some ice water on his heated words about nuking anybody.

Justin Bieber should go and spit on this goofy and dangerous dictator.

No, don’t do that.

Then Mr. Kim Jong un will definitely begin pushing buttons.

*

Not much was ever known about Shakespeare, but now we might know a bit too much about him.
The Bard was more than just a superb writer.
He was also a tax evader and hoarder:

 

Shakespeare called grain hoarder, tax dodger, money lender and ruthless businessman of Stratford-upon-Avon

‘Over a 15-year period he purchased and stored grain, malt and barley for resale at inflated prices to his neighbors and local tradesmen,’ write researchers from Aberystwyth University in Wales.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/shakespeare-grain-hoarder-tax-dodger-money-lender-researchers-article-1.1304664#ixzz2PFWyAcBp

I will continue to read his plays (or Bacon’s), even though his own honor and reputation have been stained.

*

It’s almost time to throw out the basketball, and throw in the baseball…and some new bats!

 

Louisville Slugger makes first big change since 1972, introducing splinter-resistance surface

There will be fewer cracking bats this season — at least that's the hope of the bat maker, which claims the company has achieved a '9h,' the highest hardness rating possible.

 “The Louisville Slugger Louisville Slugger is rolling out a new logo for the first time in 33 years on a new bat that company officials say is designed to be the hardest wooden bat ever produced at the Louisville, Ky., factory.”

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/louisville-slugger-change-1972-article-1.1304175#ixzz2PFb8whOm

I once picked up one of these bats, and thought that I was holding a telephone pole. 

I didn’t have a career in baseball.

It ended at my first game as a little leaguer.

It was a night game.

I was standing in center field (or right field).

Some kid on the other team hit a high, fly ball.

I waited hours for that ball to come down.

Finally, it came down, and I caught it…

Right on my forehead.

The crowd cheered!

My baseball career ended, and

I learned the meaning of irony.

*

Here’s a short history of baseball bats:

The History of Baseball Bats

Baseball bats in the early days of baseball came in all shapes and sizes. In the 1850's baseball was an extremely young sport and batters made their own bats and experimented with bats of all varieties (long, short, flat, heavy). They quickly learned that bats with rounded barrels seemed to work the best. Because bats of all shapes and sizes were being used, a rule was made in 1859 that bats could be no larger than 2.5 inches in diameter, although they could be of any length. Ten years later in 1869, another rule was added that stated the baseball bat could be no longer than 42 inches in length - the same maximum length allowed today. At this time there was no rule regarding the shape of the bat. In fact, some players sometimes used bats with flat surfaces when bunting.

The Birth of the Louisville Slugger

1884 brought the beginning of the most famous name in baseball bats today - The Louisville Slugger. It all started at a baseball game in Louisville, a 17 year old John Hillerich watched Louisville player Pete Browning become frustrated after breaking his favorite bat. Hillerich, a woodworker with his father, approached Browning after the game and offered to make him a new bat. They went together to the woodworking shop, selected a piece of white ash and Browning supervised as John Hillerich made his new bat. The next day, Browning went three for three with the new bat, word spread about the new bats, and the Hillerich family was in the baseball bat business! Demand quickly grew (although baseball bats weren't the focus of their business yet), and they soon began adding their recognizable Louisville Slugger trademark to each bat.

More Developments

In the 1890's, the rules committee stated that bats could no longer be sawed off (flat) at the end, they must be round, and the maximum diameter was increased to 2.75 inches. Shortly after 1900, Honus Wagner, one of the great players of all time, became the first player to be paid to have his autograph burned into Louisville Slugger bats. Although bats have continued to develop over the years, wood baseball bats today look similar to the bats of 100 years ago. The biggest differences, however are that bats today are much lighter and have thinner handles.

The Rise of Aluminum Bats

In 1924 a patent was issued to William Shroyer for the first metal baseball bat. Despite this early patent, metal bats were not seen in the game of baseball until 1970, when Worth introduced the games first aluminum baseball bat. Soon after, Worth produced the first one-piece aluminum bat and the first little league aluminum bat. Easton arrived in the aluminum bat scene in the late 1970's with a stronger grade of aluminum that is credited with significantly increasing the popularity of aluminum baseball bats. Despite the popularity of the bats with the baseball players nationwide, Major League Baseball (for competitive and safety reasons) has never allowed anything other than wood bats to be used. In 1993 Worth and Easton both introduced Titanium bats, and in 1995 Easton and Louisville Slugger introduced the strongest, lightest grade of aluminum bats to date. Improvements to baseball bats continue today as developments such as double walled bats and scandium-aluminum bats arrive in sporting goods stores. There is no doubt that today's high-end, scientifically designed aluminum bats are a far distant relative to the heavy, hickory bats used by players nearly 150 years ago!

2001 - Barry Bonds and Maple Bats

The 2001 baseball season brought about a feat that 10 years ago most would have thought not only impossible, but completely ridiculous - Barry Bonds hit a record 73 home runs in a single season! Soon into his home run tear it was learned that Bonds was using maple wood baseball bats, rather than the standard bats made of white ash. Players copy success, and soon major league ball players everywhere were searching for maple baseball bats! A quick search online will find dozens of companies selling maple bats. The past 150 years has brought significant changes to baseball bats and the game of baseball itself. There is no doubt that the future will bring additional changes to the seemingly simple tool known as the baseball bat.

 

http://www.baseball-bats.net/baseball-bats/baseball-bat-history/index.html

 

 

 

IT’S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!