I’ve tried very hard not to spill food on my shirt.
I now believe that I have some kind of curse.
I may buy a large bib soon.
I suppose the cause is the mindless gusto and enthusiasm I have when I eat.
The various viands slip off my tongue and dribble down my shirt.
EVERY DOGGONE TIME!
My smiles turn into frowns when I espy the fresh spots and splotches adorning my tunic, and I utter maledictions.
I am fortunate when I wear a dark shirt, or a shirt that is good camouflage for the food that just fell.
I can then just rub water into the cursed stains, and diminish them.
I’ve tried holding my plate under my chin, but the comestibles still find a way to sully my shirt.
Maybe I should start eating everything through a straw.
NO MORE DRIBBLE-DOWN GASTRONOMY!
IT’S THE OIL STUPID!