I hate clichés and catch phrases as much as my dad hated cats.
He began hating felines after one killed his canary.
But I have lied, or at least have misled, when I said that I hate clichés and catch phrases.
I am constantly using them.
Here are some that I have used in the past month (I could also tell why I said them, but won’t):
We’re all in the same boat.
Beggars can’t be choosers.
Big Brother is watching.
Here is one my mom said a lot:
IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY, DON'T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL.
The early bird catches the worm.
Quit horsing around!
Wishy, washy.
Bump on a log.
Cover my (your) ass.
When pigs can fly.
Zip it!
Button it up!
The long and short of it.
Bite your tongue.
See the glass as half empty or half full.
I am constantly repeating this one to my students:
Wake up and smell the coffee.
These are clichés I must like since I am always saying them.
There is one cliché I REALLY DON’T LIKE (and I’m not pulling the wool over your eyes):
Been there, done that.
Then there are some clichés I never knew existed.
A few of them are fairly obnoxious, and some of them border on the profane:
As horny as a three balled tomcat.
Tighter than a gnat's ass.
As useful as tits on a bull.
Busier than a one armed paper hanger.
Horny as a three peckered Billy goat.
A face like a bulldog chewing on a wasp.
Our world is filled with clichés.
Even the sentence "Oh, that's such a cliche" is a cliché.
All I want to say
Touché
To
The
Cliché!
IT'S THE OIL STUPID!
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