Thursday, November 18, 2010

NO IFS ANDS OR BUTS





AIRPORT SECURITY:
Sir, is there anything suspicious on your person?

MALE PASSENGER:
No. But...

AS:
Sir, did you say butt?

MALE PASSENGER:
Yes, but...

AS:
Sir, come with me.

MALE PASSENGER:
But...

AS:
Yes, your butt!

[AS escorts the male passenger to a private room.]

MALE PASSENGER:
Why did you bring me here?

AS:
Sir, we must search your rectal cavity to make sure that there is nothing inside that poses any threat.

MALE PASSENGER:
You've got to be kidding? I'd rather just leave and go home.

AS:
No, sir. If you do that, we'll need to detain and fine you.

MALE PASSENGER:
But...

AS:
Exactly.



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!


Wednesday, October 20, 2010

DON'T ASK AND DON'T TELL ON THE BATTLEFIELD





SOLDIER BOB:
Hey, Butch, how's it hanging?

SOLDIER BUTCH:
Hey, Bob, I told you to quit saying that.

SOLDIER BOB:
I don't mean anything by it...it's just my way of asking you how things are going.

SOLDIER BUTCH:
I know, but for me it's an unpleasant way to ask.

SOLDIER BOB:
Alright. I won't ask it like that again. So, how are you? What have you been up to?

SOLDIER BUTCH:
Just hanging out...I mean chilling until the next call to duty.

SOLDIER BOB:
Hold on...something's up.

SOLDIER BUTCH:
What is it? Some Incoming?

SOLDIER BOB:
No. It's the phone.

[SOLDIER BOB listens intently to the voice at the other end. A perplexed look is forming on his face.]

SOLDIER BUTCH:
It was Headquarters. The Commander just said that another Federal judge has reversed the decision on Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

SOLDIER BOB:
So?

SOLDIER BUTCH:
So we have to hold our fire. No more shooting. Hold on...it's the phone again. "Yes sir. Yes, we will, sir. Over and out."

SOLDIER BOB:
What is it now?

SOLDIER BUTCH:
We've been relieved of duty until we can legally be asked and tell again

SOLDIER BOB:
What should we do now?

SOLDIER BUTCH:
GET MARRIED!

IT'S THE OIL STUPID!




Saturday, September 18, 2010

ELITE TEABAGS DOPE(S) AND DELUSION




The bituminous and bumpy road to 2012 is starting to bubble and boil with trouble and toil.

America...
Of what stuff are ye made?

Who shall we Americans put our trust in next?

To whom will we throw our precious marbles in November and 2012?

Will Ethics ever trump the quest for political power?

Will more or fewer politicians transcend their own thirsty Greed for position and power?

Will the election of new Senators and Congressman in November result in those who will defend and fight for the strapped and suffering poor---for the struggling and stymied Middle Class---instead of defending and fighting for the more than comfortable Super-Rich?

Tax what we consume and not our jobs!

Will fear continue to be the dominant sound that is vomited out of clangorous trumpets?

Will the ranting voices of radicals continue to be louder than the calmer notes of humanity and reason?

I fear for America.

I am fearful not because I believe those---or believe in them---whose arrogant and inflated egos are shrieking...

I am fearful because I fear that a growing number of Americans are suspending their critical thinking, and are now swallowing---hook, bait, and sinker---the radical, ruthless and disingenuous rhetoric of demagogues.

If you can't reach out to or teach people with facts, then just keep scaring them with fabrication!

You betcha!

Americans who are out of work will be voting for CHANGE AGAIN, but the change (and changes) that they are yearning and yelling for will not be as important and propitious as the current (and future) HOPE of the Obama administration.

The Tea-Baggers bellow a lot, but mostly for naught.

Their bellowing is not so much for the majority of the American people---or for social-environmental improvements---as it is for just kicking out an authentic and hopeful American who just happens to be black.
Oh, and one must not forget that their braying is also for the very wealthiest who have feathered their nasty nests.

The bigotry and racism of the Tea Party are more powerful than its humanism, but for the sake of the nation, hopefully they are not more persuasive.

The Disaster of the Bush Decade will not disappear with a Tea Party or Republican victory, but if victory is had, the effects of their return to power will repeat a history that cursed our nation in the previous decade.

I'll take the Hope of Democrats over the Change of the Tea Party and GOP anytime.

Friday, September 10, 2010

TO BURN OR NOT TO BURN






He has the right to criticize who has the heart to help.
Abraham Lincoln

We have forgotten the gracious hand which has preserved us in peace and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us, and have vainly imagined in the deceitfulness of our hearts that all these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own. Intoxicated with unbroken success, we have become too self sufficient to feel the necessity of redeeming and preserving Grace, too proud to pray to the God that made us.
Abraham Lincoln


***

To love or not to love?

To understand.

To forgive.

To Transcend...to Transform...to increase the better angels of our nature.

We can tolerate others if they do not harm us.

We cannot tolerate those who want to do us harm.

America was once founded on religious freedom---and yes, the Creator---the Divine Spark, etc.... was mentioned by more than a few of the "Founding Fathers" more often than not.

But things have changed.

Regardless of whether 9-11 was an inside or outside job---THE UNITED STATES DOES HAVE ENEMIES.

All conquering empires have.

But it seems that we now have a surplus.

There are too many reasons to enumerate here in this short letter of (clichés?) aphoristic thoughts.

Is it because of our own expansive and expensive consumption of things?

China would probably say yes, but not criticize this Raison d'être for their own expanding Economy.

We are number one in the World as Over-Consumers.

We must exploit and conquer and contain real estate ( and oil), in order to maintain our expansive and abundant lifestyles.

This might not be bad in itself, except for Wars, Ecological Destruction, etc.

And in order to continue these commodious and consumptive ways of living, we must keep our enemies (competitors?) at bay.

But today, the day before the "anniversary" of September 11, it is as Pogo has told us:

We have met the enemy and he is us.

But more precisely, Pogo, the enemy is Florida preacher Jerry Jones, and all of his (unkind) kind.

Ignorance, Intolerance, Closed-mindedness, and Hatred are as strong an enemy as Al-Qaeda.


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Saturday, September 04, 2010

SPEWING SPIGOTS FULL OF BRAIN FREEZES & 2012




bigoted evangelistic
politicians
babbling hate and fear
making people
fearful and hateful
pining for perfect order
for beds of roses
for this and that

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

DRUGS GUNS BLOOD-SUCKING BEDBUGS AND POLITICIANS









Bedbugs and politicians have been with us for a long time.

Natural remedies for human ills began long before modern science gave us modern medicine with its myriad wonder drugs and its many quack potions.

Drug Pushers (Cartels-Corporations) and Politicians are as happy as the Blood-sucking Bedbugs.

All produce a lot of human itching and scratching.

Guns?

They make a lot of money and produce a lot of pain, which drives drug pushers to make more drugs.

The bed bugs are quite content to suck our blood while the guns and drugs are doing their jobs.



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

***

Hard evidence for a long human association turned up fairly recently, when British archaeologists excavating an ancient Egyptian village found the oldest bedbug on record: The fossilized fellow dated back about 3,500 years, to before the time of King Tut.

Bedbugs first turned up in print in ancient Greece and Rome. The Roman philosopher Pliny described the bugs in a book on natural history; Greek playwright Aristophanes wrote the pests into several plays.

Source: LA Times


***

High Temperatures Cause UAE Bed Bugs To Bite

When temperatures increase, so do the incidents of bugs, including those that your mother sang about before you went to bed

As complex, rollercoaster climate change alters life on this planet, we will confront new and unforeseen challenges. Some problems we can anticipate such as reduced food supply and further reductions of biodiversity. We’ve encountered higher, more fatal flooding incidents as a result of decreased biomass, as well as drought. But other symptoms of global warming, such as the new tide of insect infestations in the UAE, may seem less dramatic and less obvious. Could rising temperatures in the United Arab Emirates be the cause of a new tide of insect infestations?

5 MM Long Bed Bugs Are Bitin’

Megan Detrie from The National reports that a new strain of bed bugs has infiltrated the United Arab Emirates. Only 5mm long, they hitch a ride into people’s homes via clothing and personal items, and then stake out in beds, paintings, wall sockets, and essentially any other elusive, dark place.

The bugs are more active during the summer due to the heat and humidity, but remain a problem year-round, according to pest experts. “The incidences are increasing,” said Mr R, the operations manager of National Pest Control, with offices in Abu Dhabi, Dubai and Sharjah.

“Out of 10 inquiries, seven of them are for bed bugs.”

These bugs are able to survive up to 18 months without food, though they typically seek out nourishment every eight days. When they do, they sneak out of their dark crevices at night, while the rest of the home is fast asleep.

Slippery little buggers

As a result, bed bugs are very difficult to snuff out. Further adding to their cunning, the pests have evolved to resist low level pesticides used to control them, and require several blasts, leading to drastic efforts to exterminate them. Unfortunately, some of these methods have exterminated people instead.

“The Ministry of Environment and Water has increased the limits on the kinds of pesticides available to licensed pest control companies after two of five-month-old triplets died when pest controllers sprayed their neighbour’s home in Ajman in late March,” according to Detrie.

Dubai’s municipality demands that pest controllers disclose the pesticides they are using, as well as their registration certificates, but this hasn’t stopped some “rogue” outfits from taking matters into their own hands.






Monday, August 09, 2010

IN TODAY'S NEWS


1. THE FIRST TEST TUBE BABY HAD A BABY
[IN A TEST TUBE?}

2. THE U.S. IS NUMBER 12 IN THE WORLD FOR ASSOCIATE DEGREES. CANADA IS #1, SOUTH KOREA IS #2, AND RUSSIA IS #3.
[WHY?]

3. STUDY: PERSONALITIES MAY BE SET AS EARLY AS FIRST GRADE
[AND CHARACTER?]

4. RICHARD HAAS ON AFGHANISTAN: IT'S HARD TO MAKE THE CASE THAT IT'S WORTH IT.
[IF IT'S NOT HARD THEN WHY BE SOFT ON GETTING OUT?]

5. UN: PAKISTAN FLOOD MISERY MAY RIVAL 2004 INDIAN OCEAN TSUNAMI AND 2010 HAITI EARTHQUAKE
[WHAT'S NEXT?]

6. BOEHNER [R-OH] SAYS 14TH AMENDMENT REVISION "WORTH CONSIDERING"
[YEAH, GIVE IT A NEW, TANNED AND ORANGE LOOK]

7. REPORT: WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION TO DECLARE H1N1 PANDEMIC OVER
[DID IT EVER REALLY EXIST?]

8. LOS ANGELES TIMES: BIG MONEY SITS ON THE SIDELINES OF POT LEGALIZATION BATTLE
[FOR TAXES, VOTES, POT...OR ALL THREE?]

9. BOEHNER [R-OH] SAYS "THERE ARE A LOT OF OPTIONS" ON RAISING RETIREMENT AGE.
[A LOT OF OPTIONS? THIS IS JUST OBFUSCATION BENEATH AN ORANGE TAN (ORANGUTAN?). THE CURRENT AGE TO RETIRE WOULD JUST GO UP!]

10. JOE SCARBOROUGH ON AFGHANISTAN: "WE WON, LET'S GO HOME".
[GOOD IDEA]



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!


Thursday, August 05, 2010

PEACOCKS CROWS AND COJONES







The little lady from Wasilla is coming into her own...

ABSURDITY, INANITY, STUPIDITY...

Well, let's just call it her BOORISH, PETULANT, PETTINESS.

When I see and hear the boorish, petulant, and petty Palin, I cannot disassociate her from the ominous words in the bumper sticker at the top.

And this petty, petulant, and pretty "princess" is a comedian---not a SERIOUS politician---and she certainly is NOT a statesman.
Not now...

Not tomorrow...

Nor in the Hereafter.

P.S.
She's a bad comedian!



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!


P.S.
PALIN WILL CONTINUE TO PIPE OUT HER PIOUS, POISONOUS, AND PARANOID CATERWAULS, HOPING TO GAIN POLITICAL POWER AND FORTUNE.

PROPAGANDISTIC PROWESS IS BEING USED TO POSSESS THE (MOOSE) HORNS OF THE U.S. PRESIDENCY, AND/OR ASSIST OTHERS TO DO SO.

BUT CAN THIS WINKING WHINER FROM WASILLA WIN THE WHITE HOUSE, AND TAKE THE COUNTRY AWAY (AGAIN) FROM THE AMERICAN PEOPLE?

SHE POSSESSES THE GLITZ AND GLAMOUROUS GIGGLESGIGGLES, BUT HOPEFULLY SHE WON'T POSSESS THE PRIZE OF THE GULLIBILITY OF A NATION THAT IS FULL OF DAZED AND DISGRUNTLED VOTERS WHO ARE AS FICKLE AS THE WEATHER.

THIS IS THE BAD NEWS.

THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT PALIN IS PHYSICALLY PRESENT, BUT PSYCHOLOGICALLY ABSENT!







Monday, July 19, 2010

TO REFUDIATE OR NOT TO REFUDIATE



Something in the wind
Pomp and circumstance Tedious as a twice-told tale
Stony hearted Primrose path
Trippingly on the tongue Set my teeth on edge
Something wicked this way comes



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

MAD TO THE MAX



I've watched the
Lethal Weapon movies a number of times.

I liked the first one the best.

I remember how convincing Mr. Gibson looked every time that he acted insane.

Mel's big, blue eyes didn't blink.

Would he pull the trigger or continue to just look mad?

Mad Mel Gibson has (as the saying goes) some issues.

Is it easier to hate life and the world than it is to love and embrace them?

Mr. Gibson, you've become a dangerous disappointment.


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!



Monday, July 12, 2010

SYNTHETIC LIFE FORMS


https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-7310325/Spanish-scientist-claims-grown-worlds-human-monkey-hybrid.html





Creation
By Emily Cooper



"It's important to watermark and label synthetic organisms".
Craig Venter
(Founder of Synthetic Genomics)



*


Maybe it's better to not make these synthetic organisms in the first place.

The word Organism has an innocuous sound, but the words synthetic life form don't.

Or would the human race be better off with some "new blood".

Perhaps it's time for our petroleum-polluted planet to have new forms of life.

We can't wait much longer for benevolent extraterrestrials to save us---

or for malevolent ones who might put us out of our misery.




Below are two letters I wrote in 2005-06.


MEN LIKE GODS

Chimeras. Human-Animal Hybrids.
Lion-Goat-Serpents.
Welcome---once again---to Brave New World.
No need to be invaded by extraterrestrials.
This world is making its own aliens.
Men like gods will do as they want or need to do.
In this case, to create new creatures never before on the planet. A kind of New-age urban renewal.
"The technology is advancing quicker than the regulations," said Osagie Obasogie of the Oakland-based Center for Genetics and Society, which opposes the mixing of human and animal cells.
Of course, this genetic engineering is intended only to do good things.
But we all know about good intentions and where they sometimes go. Take as an example Mr. Atom.
Progress does not put on any brakes.
Tomorrow we might see ourselves in zoos and looking out at the new and improved creatures that we have created.
At least I can dream.





The Human Mouse

Get ready for mice with human brains.

That's not the end of it. There are already pigs with 80% human blood and sheep with human livers.

These chimera are the latest products of our Brave New World.

The mouse with a human brain is the brainchild of the Stanford University's Institute of Cancer/Stem Cell Biology.

The "human" mouse will be made from the stem cells of aborted fetuses.

How noble!

The cat will be in more jeopardy than the brainier mouse in a cat-and-mouse chase.

Science is boldly taking us where perhaps we shouldn’t go.

The Peaceful Atom is not so peaceful anymore.

So, how can we expect mice with human brains to improve Humanity?

“Are you a Man or a Mouse?”

I’m going to eat some cheese and think about it.

Poor mouse!

He was so cute and harmless until he was HUMANIZED.





 IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!




***


"Lab creates new life form"

By ANDY SOLTIS
May 21, 2010
http://www.nypost.com


It's alive!

Scientists have generated a new form of life, a tiny cell powered by lab-made DNA, they announced yesterday.

The stunning breakthrough, after 15 years, many false starts and $30-plus million of research, opens the door to designer microbes that could fight pollution, vaccinate against diseases and produce biofuels that would replace gas and oil.

J. Craig Venter, of a self-named institute in Maryland, said his 20-member scientific team sewed together pieces of the genetic material of a goat-disease microbe.

He said the result, a kind of genetic "software," was created using just four bottles of chemicals, a computer and a kind of chemical copy-making machine. "This is the first self-replicating species that we have had on the planet whose parent is a computer," Venter said.


Thursday, July 08, 2010

MAMA GRIZZLIES PINK ELEPHANTS AND SARAH PALIN


Sarah Palin is a sexy, gooey, gushing gal...
Like a yawning oil well!

More of her rhetorical tar balls are rolling across our television screens.

Her oily and gaudy globules are getting bigger and bigger as the 2012 election gets closer and closer.

It's once again getting exciting.

While the U.S. Economy is trying to come out of its tailspin, the road to the White House is newly paved and painted, and it is starting to get busy.

Hold on to your hats.

Put on your thinking caps.

Paul the Octopus needs to stay strong and healthy...

Because there's plenty of prognosticating ahead!



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

SUPERMAN BATMAN AND LEBRON JAMES


1. When will the Gulf's greedy and ghoulish oil stop gushing?

2. Where did the Queen of England sleep last night?

3. Where will Lebron James go?

This latter question is the ball that is jouncing up and down the cerebral courts of sports fans and sports spokespersons.
It's akin to giving birth.
In this case, however, it is the delivery of the answer to question number 3.
World Soccer must take a backseat until Lebron tells us tonight.
What team will get the slam dunk?
Maybe Paul the Octopus can tell us.
Stay tuned.
Here's a list of possibilities:

Cleveland
Miami with Wade & Bosh
New York with Stoudemire
Chicago with Rose
New Jersey with Jay-Z


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!




Sunday, July 04, 2010

July 4, 2010

THE TRIUMPH OF HELL
By Peter Bruegel the Elder


We're at a
turning point!
It's now or never
to get the job done!
Legs and arms will not be gone
Until this war has been won!
The surge is on!
Aim our mighty gun
Until this war is won...
And
the
job
is
done!



P.S.

War is Perpetual.
War is Weary.
Time has been tabled.
But there is talk that
There's a timetable to
Put an end to this War.
But War is Perpetual.



IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

NUKES ANTS AND BONERS







He's sometimes called the tan man (or tanned man), but not the tin man.

The latter fictional character, of course, is from L. Frank Baum's book The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, and this wonderful, tin woodman eventually obtained a real heart.
This is something that Republican Representative John A. Boehner of Ohio ought to work on obtaining, and while he's at it, get a brain, too.

Mr. Boehner gave us a few bones and boners to pick (on) recently.

Here are a few to stew on (but not enough for a top-ten list):

"Will we fight or will we retreat? That is the question that is posed to us. Some of my friends on the other side of the aisle often refer to Iraq as a distraction."
(And Afghanistan?)

"The American people have written off the Democrats. They're willing to look at us again."
(Especially at the perpetually tanned man from Ohio.)

"They have called Operation Iraqi Freedom a war of choice that isn't part of the real war on terror. Someone should tell that to al Qaeda."

"They're snuffing out the America that I grew up in."
(George W. Bush and them should receive credit for that, Mr. Bonehead.)

"This is killing an ant with a nuclear weapon."
(It shouldn't be this easy for a politician to lob around the word nuke or nuclear in today's World of Terror, but when you're cute and tan like the bone man...you can!)

"The number one responsibility of the federal government ... is to provide security to the American people. As difficult as it is and as expensive as it is, we don't have a choice."
(He was commenting on funding the war in Afghanistan. I guess we've already won in Iraq.)

"We need to look at the American people and explain to them that we're broke."
(O.K., and while you're at it, say that you'll take a cut in your salary.)

"It's easy to kick somebody when they're down. George W. Bush [has] dealt with more difficult issues than any president since Franklin Roosevelt. And I've told my colleagues it's time that we go stand up for the president."
(This is one of Boehner's biggest boners.)


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!





Wednesday, June 23, 2010

GOOD NEWS BAD NEWS



GOOD NEWS:
The U.S.A. Soccer team won.
BAD NEWS:
The gulf well is an uncapped geyser again.

GOOD NEWS:
Ultra low interest rates continue.
BAD NEWS:
Unemployment rates remain high.

GOOD NEWS:
Lady Gaga is a baseball fan.
BAD NEWS:
Lady Gaga was put in Jerry Seinfeld's luxury box without his permission.


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Monday, June 21, 2010

HEMMORHOIDS ASTEROIDS AND VUZULELAS



Don't stop blowing those vuzulelas!

NASA is planning to put people on asteroids!

Astronauts (or Asteroidnuts) must go to the asteroids since it's unlikely that they'll visit us.

Which ones?

That will have to be decided.

First determine which ones have got the most precious metals.
No use in going so far just to plop down on useless matter.

President Obama has wisely opted to bypass the moon and head for Mars...
where the Martians are (though there are some who believe that the Moon's sunless side has "alien" bases.)

If the Creator and the gods had wanted humans to remain on terra firma, then He and they should not have populated the Universe(s) with so many other places to visit.

They're there and that's why they have to be visited.

For good, bad, or ugly.

Outer Space is where future explorers (and discoverers) are going...
with or without the help from any extraterrestrials.

Humans like to get outside of themselves. Out of their skins.
We like to visit new places.

The Unknown attracts.

Even when dangers or monsters lurk.

These did not stop...

Taming the Wild West... Traveling across the Oceans... Crossing the Rockies... Landing on Asteroids!

Or...

Entering Worm Holes and Black Holes!

Where there's a way (and places to go) there will always be a will!


IT'S THE ASTEROIDS STUPID!




Monday, June 14, 2010

OPIUM OR LITHIUM?





Ores of Old!

Iron and Niobium!
Copper and Gold!
Lithium and Opium!

Now there's really something to fight for in Afghanistan!
Freedom and democracy are o.k., but nothing takes the cake or puts smiles on faces like...
MONEY!

Wars for oil?
Forget it!
Wars for lithium, iron, copper, and gold?
You betcha!

China: Keep out!
You have plenty of your own mineral resources!
But the U.S. of A. needs a lot if we're going to really go green!

Batteries need lithium!
Afghanistan has lots of lithium!
Therefore, stay in Afghanistan!
Stop the Taliban!

The war on terror is now a war for copper, lithium, iron, and gold!


IT'S THE LITHIUM AND GOLD STUPID!


***

For more read:
"U.S. Identifies Vast Riches of Minerals in Afghanistan"
By James Risen
The New York Times
June 13, 2010








Wednesday, May 26, 2010

CARNIVAL BARKERS AND WHIRLING DERVISHES





Go, Joe, go!

Lift the veil off of a vivacious, reloaded, vicious vixen of half-cocked trials and tribulations.

Peer into the poor psyche and pseudo soul of her who never retreats (except from being Alaskan governor).

Follow the money.

Strip away the superficial layers of her meager mind, and flesh out the unknown and deeper sides of her being.

Make a few million bucks for yourself---Joe McGinniss
the writer (Not the plumber).

Sarah Palin will probably add you and your book to her list of endangered species.


IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

DRILL BABY DRILL




You gave me Trees!
You gave me Gold!
You gave me Uranium!
You gave me Water!
You gave me Cows!
You gave me Tuna!
You gave me Lobster!
You gave me Shrimp!
You gave me Crab!
You gave me Chickens!
You gave me 3-D!
You gave me T.V.!
You gave me DVD!
You gave me Weekends!
You gave me Walmart!
You gave me Big Mac!
You gave me Cola!
You gave me Computer!
You gave me Oil!





IT'S THE OIL STUPID!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

GET IT IN THE HOLE

I've had these quotes laying (or lying?) around.
(I like to end sentences with prepositions, don't you?)
But I lie.
It actually makes me feel somewhat guilty.
A proposition would be a better word to end a sentence with.
Anyway, here are some leftover quotes from this year's Masters that I had not intended to post, but since the ink well of my imagination has been meager and dry of late, I'm posting these holy quotes. I know...I've just used a bad pun to end my sentence with.
And, I know...this last preposition was totally unnecessary.
***

Well holed...nice, rhythmic stroke.

This man has been up and down like a yo-yo.

He's been holing these coming in.

He needs to hole this.

A hole that's very special to him.

I think he's boned it.

He's too high...too hard.

Is that coming all the way out?

So far stuck behind me.

The hole is 156 yards long and they just tear their hair out.

Solid stance...crisp contact.

He came back with a 69.

Let the natural contours turn it around.

It's a different kettle of fish.

Ohhh...that's the one!

If it just happened to fall in it would be an extra bonus.

He has no chrome on the club for extra bite.



THAT'S NOT WHAT SHE SAID.


Thursday, April 22, 2010

POEMS AND QUOTES FOR EARTH DAY 2010


El Dora

Infinity's rainbow
Scattered flowers

Across the mountain

Mornings sang
Stars smiled

A river flowed

Across my eyes

Broken corners
Of the heart rose.



Children Are People


People are hippies, dope dealers (mostly
business men)
And lonely old ladies and gentlemen

Shipwrecked idealists
ordained by a headless horseman
with muscular flanks

galloping, galloping
in you and me.

Children are people
who are not hippies, business men,
lonely old ladies or gentlemen
or shipwrecked idealists

Children are flowers, trees, butterflies,
birds and bees who constantly keep a sense
of humor and sadness around hippies, business
men, lonely old ladies and gentlemen and
shipwrecked idealists who talk about God (who
might be a business man) with muscular flanks
galloping, galloping in you and me.



Poem for David

The Earth is beautiful
When you see the sun
And smell the air
And plant life
Because you are
The sun and Earth
And a moon child
You are beautiful
Like when you smile
You are alive and growing
As a seed in the Earth
You were born today
And tomorrow you will be
An older gardener of
Corn and strawberries
And I love you
Since you plant life



Bamian Afghanistan

Echoes of Tamerlane, Genghis Khan and
Alexander were found in tourquoise, opal and
Amethyst dreams,
Young vagabonds slept on Persian rugs
Beneath Heaven's green pastures far below
Tall Buddhas on Bamian's plains.
While bright on earth green grass grew under
Falling rain, above the sky lit up dark
Echoed man's last refrain:
'We hail the rains to bring us back to life;
We hail the rains to remove this mortal rule
of knife.' But thunder shouted and sirens cried,
People hurried, they fought and died.
Echoes of Tamerlane, Genghis Khan and
Alexander were found in tourquoise, opal and
Amethyst dreams,
Young vagabonds slept on Persian rugs
Beneath Heaven's green pastures
Far below tall Buddhas on Bamian's plains.


Time Capsule

The cold machines from earth
Travelled as far as they could
And travelled empty paths
Through endless spaces
Filled with myriad stars and
Galaxies
For one thousand years.

It didn't matter, after all,
Since life on earth as men
Had known it was gone
And the men, the intelligent
Knowers and machine-lover makers
Had also disappeared.

The sun never felt a thing
And God remained inside
His big laboratory quietly thinking
About what to do next.


Bulletin

FoOlisH sCiEnCe
Go To SlEep
FoReVeR
tHe UbIqUiToUs NiGhT
iS FuLl Of ScReAmS
iT iS rAiNiNg oN fLoWeRs.
BuLlEtIn:
ThE KeYs To HeAvEn HaVe BeEn LoSt On EaRtH.
iF tHe MoOn Is PoWeR tHe RaVeN (sNoW) iS
DaRkNeSs.
RoAr Of ThE lIoN aNd ThE gEnTlE lAmB
wHo WiLl WiN
sAiD a ChIlD oF nOwHeRe
ThE lIlAcS iN hEr HaIr.


Last Appeal

Atomic madmen
You dancers
Of doom
Leave my Earth
Go live on the Moon
Leave my universe
Atomic madmen
You don't scare me
Boom.


Entry 248
Flying Saucers come from distant worlds.
Dr. Herman Oberth

Something unknown to our understanding is visiting this Earth.
Dr. Mitrovan Zverev

Information is desired if this was some new or experimental aircraft or for any explanation whatsoever.
1949 CIA memo

Reliable reports indicate there are objects coming into our atmosphere at very high speeds and controlled by thinking intelligences.
Rear Admiral Delmar Fahrney
U.S. Navy Missile Chief

The nations of the world will have to unite for the next war will be an interplanetary war. The nations of Earth must some day make a common front against attack by people from other planets.
General Douglas MacArthur


Entry 258
The question is not so much whether there is life on Mars as whether it will continue to be possible to live on Earth.
Unknown


What kind of world is this that can send machines to Mars and does nothing to stop the killing of a human being.
Jose Saramago


I am part of the sea and stars
And the winds of the South and North;
Of mountains and Moon and Mars,
And the ages sent me forth!
Edward H.S. Terry


Entry 268
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
Oscar Wilde

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.
Og Mandino

We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.
Mark Twain


Starlight

AnD tHeRe It WaS.

ThE vErY fIrSt StAr.

ThE vErY fIrSt TeAr

Of LiGhT iN tHe UnIvErSe.

StArLiGhT.

Oh WhAt A mYsTeRy

Is HeAvEn

AnD

wOmEn

So LoVeLy

An EaRtH.

By M.L. Squier





Wednesday, April 21, 2010

HAPPY EARTH DAY EVE


I'm "reposting" some letters for tomorrow's Earth Day.

I can't fit them all into this post, so they'll come one after another on this eve of another Earth Day along with these same words.

But first, I want to say:


Oh men of Earth...

End your murdering!

Dear, dear Earth...

Forgive us for what we have done to thee!


***

THE FIRST EARTH DAY


"We only have one earth, so we need to take care of her."
That's what Senator Gaylord Nelson of Wisconsin believed. He was disturbed that an issue as important as our environment was not addressed in politics or by the media, so he created the first Earth Day, on April 22, 1970. An estimated 20 million people nationwide attended festivities that day. It was a truly astonishing grassroots explosion, leading eventually to national legislation such as the Clean Air Act and the Clean Water Act.


I remember that first
Earth Day.
I was living in Boulder, Colorado.
The most salient memory is of the many Geodesic Domes.
All of those triangles interconnected!
The dream-come-true of any hippie!
A couple of years later, when I was living alone in a quiet one-room "cottage" along Boulder Creek, I had an experience that truly put me in touch with the Earth.
It was a frosty white winter evening.
I was driving my Datsun truck and saw two people asking for a ride (their thumbs extended).
I stopped and asked where they needed to go.
They pointed ahead and said "Sugarloaf Road".
"Get in", I said.
His wife's name was Heidi. I forget his. But I won't forget his huge, red beard that was almost down to his knees.
When I stopped, they invited me to visit their home.
We walked through the snow-laden forest for about quarter of a mile.
"It's over there", said the long-bearded husband.
"Where?", I asked.
"That round circle on the ground", Heidi replied.
Her husband lifted a "door" and they invited me to come in.
Inside this hole dug into the earth was their home.
It was Z-shaped.
A small mattress sat on the top part of the Z. I sat here.
A treadle sewing machine was at the bottom of the Z.
"We put a Tepee on top when winter ends", Heidi said.
Then Heidi's husband showed me a round object covered with colorful "strings".
The strings were copper wires.
The round object was a small bicycle wheel.
"What is it?, I asked.
"It's this", he said.
And he handed me a small metal box.
"It's a bio-feedback machine".
I stared in disbelief at both objects.
"My company is called Psionics", he said.
It was the very first biofeedback machine. I felt honored.
I didn't stay long.
Heidi and her husband walked with me part way down the path from their home.
I was walking back to my truck astonished, when out of the cold blue evening sky a bolt of lightning struck just a few feet in front of me.
This thunderbolt out of Heaven was as remarkable as that meeting in the Earth.

HAPPY EARTH DAY EVE

I'm "reposting" some letters for tomorrow's Earth Day.

I can't fit them all into this post, so they'll come one after another on this eve of another Earth Day along with these same words.

But first, I want to say:

Oh men of Earth...

End your murdering!

Dear, dear Earth...

Forgive us for what we have done to thee!


FAIR FRIEND OF LIFE


By Alexis America


When the well is dry, we know the worth of water.
Benjamin Franklin


***


It's high time we get our ardent and arrogant arses up to Mars.

Coca-Cola and Bill Gates can foot the bill.

Why?

Not just because water is there,
but because there is less and less water here.

Start bottling and stockpiling the almost pure water up there on Mars, and shuttle it back to Earth .

Freshwater supplies on Earth will be gone in the not so distant future.

Sooner than we expect.

Of course, new and efficient vehicles that travel to Mars must be built.

Perhaps robotic drones will do the heavy lifting and arduous traveling for us.

You and I can stay home---in front of the computer---or TV--- and watch sports events, etc.


BUT...

It might be cheaper (and much more convenient) to get clean water in our own backyards:

Melt ice caps and/or drag them to our shores!

Global Solar Desalinization!

Remove the windy, waffling, bountiful water that lies in the brains of Democrats and Republicans!


Instead of killing each other here on Earth, we should be fighting to save our planet!

LET'S GO TO MARS...

Or just stay home and begin some serious planning for the bad and dry times ahead...

NOW!


***


99 percent pure water ice found on Mars

http://trak.in/news/99-percent-pure-water-ice-found-on-mars/7846/

Washington, September 25 (ANI): NASA’s Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter (MRO) has revealed sub-surface water ice that may be 99 percent pure, halfway between the North Pole and the equator on the Red Planet.

“We knew there was ice below the surface at high latitudes of Mars, but we find that it extends far closer to the equator than you would think, based on Mars’ climate today,” said Shane Byrne of the University of Arizona, a member of the High Resolution Imaging Science Experiment, or HiRISE, which runs the high-resolution camera on NASA’s Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter.

“The other surprising discovery is that ice exposed at the bottom of these meteorite impact craters is so pure,” Byrne said.

“The thinking before was that ice accumulates below the surface between soil grains, so there would be a 50-50 mix of dirt and ice. We were able to figure out, given how long it took that ice to fade from view, that the mixture is about one percent dirt and 99 percent ice,” he added.

Scientists used several instruments on the Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter, or MRO, in quick succession in detecting and confirming highly pure, bright ice exposed in new craters, ranging from 1.5 feet to 8 feet deep, at five different Martian sites.

In August 2008, the orbiter’s Context camera team examined their images for any dark spots or other changes that weren’t visible in earlier images of the same area. Meteorites usually leave dark marks when they crash into dust-covered Mars terrain.

The HiRISE team, which bases its operations at the UA Lunar and Planetary Laboratory, followed up in September 2008 by taking high-resolution images of the dark spots.

“We saw something very unusual when we followed up on the first of these impact craters, and that was this bright blue material poking up from the bottom of the crater. It looked a lot like water ice. And sure enough, when we started monitoring this material, it faded away like you’d expect water ice to fade, because water ice is unstable on Mars’ surface and turns directly into water vapor in the atmosphere,” Byrne said.

A few days later that September, the orbiter’s “CRISM” team used their Compact Reconnaissance Imaging Spectrometer for Mars and got the spectral signature of water ice exposed in one of the impact craters, further clinching the discovery.

How far water ice extends toward the equator depends largely on how much water has been available in the Martian atmosphere in the recent past.

“The ice is a relic of a more humid climate not very long ago, perhaps just several thousand years ago,” Byrne said. (ANI)


***


WHAT IS WATER?

In any language it is the
Beginning and
End of
Life.

By M.L. Squier

HAPPY EARTH DAY EVE

I'm "reposting" some letters for tomorrow's Earth Day.

I can't fit them all into this post, so they'll come one after another on this eve of another Earth Day.

But first, I want to say:

Oh men of Earth...

End your murdering!

Dear, dear Earth...

Forgive us for what we have done to thee!



IT'S A JUNKYARD OUT THERE





FETA:
Where are we?

GRETA:
The Astromap says Earth.

FETA:
Well, this planet has plenty of water.

GRETA:
True, but its atmosphere is a big junkyard of debris.

FETA:
When you deploy cloaking, also deploy debris shields so we don’t get penetrated by any of this junk.

GRETA:
O.K. Ooh, that was a close one.

FETA:
Deploy debris shields!

(Explosion)
United States Strategic Command:
Stand down lasers. ET vehicle has been destroyed by space junk.



***