ROMAINE LETTUCE AND CAPITALIST PIGS

“no copyright infringement is intended”

It will soon be Thanksgiving Day.

People who want to shop quickly and efficiently on Black Friday should go easy on the turkey.

In fact, don't eat a thing.

Power to the people who are the fittist.

And especially don't eat any Romaine lettuce.

It could be a killer before you are injured or killed at the gathering of frenzied hordes on Black Friday.

*

I am probably too critical when I write CAPITALIST PIGS.

Most of us are capitalists, but not pigs.

But when I see images of people knocking each other over to be first to grab something that they probably don't need but want to buy, I believe capitalist and pig should then be conjoined.

(I just looked at my back yard. The pigeons are as big as turkeys.)

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES ROMAINE LETTUCE AND CAPITALIST PIGS

YOU'RE NOT A NEANDERTHAL SIT UP STRAIGHT

The March of Progress (pictured) is a now discredited theory that said humans (far right) evolved from chimps (far left). The image gives an illustrative view of different stages in the evolution of hominids. Modern-day humans have many extinct cousin species that share a common ancestor. These include: Homo heidelbergensis, Neanderthals and Homo erectus

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-6333443/3D-reconstruction-60-000-year-old-rib-cage-reveals-Neanderthals-stood-straight.html

Mother:

Sit up straight. You're hunching again.

Son:

But mom, I'm not a neanderthal.

*

Neanderthals again.

This time it's about their skeletal structure and posture.

Neanderthals may have walked more upright than modern humans.

They also may have had stronger lungs than us.

Neanderthals in marathon runs would have wiped our butts (but not literally).

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND NEANDERTHALS

SPEAK CLEARLY

News commentators need to speak more clearly... and

SLOW DOWN!

They're speaking so fast that words and pronunciations are left in the dust.

Maybe if they chewed gum it would slow down their speaking and help stick their words together.

And it isn't just the big cable news channels.

The garbling and mumbling occurs on the local news.

Just now I heard one well-known newsman say language, but it sounded like langage.

He said victory, and it sounded like vicory.

This bothers me.

I start yelling or change the channel.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND SPEAKING CLEARLY

A COLD NIGHT AT INNISFREE

One frosty and freezing December night in 1973 Joan Bliss and I zipped ourselves into a sleeping bag.

 Inside the sleeping bag we were as tight as sardines in a can (and by tight I don't mean intoxicated).

She and I did not become amorous, but I do recall some sparks igniting when our two bodies touched.

Neither of us made any moves to do anything.

We had gotten into our snug and warm cocoon simply to avoid death by freezing.

We decided not to go outside to look at the comet Kohoutek, and we would need to wait another 75,000 years before it passed by again; but the comet was a dud anyway. President Nixon summed up the event when he was asked what he thought of the comet: He replied, “No comment.”
Or maybe he said, "No comet."

My visit to Innisfree occurred when I was footloose and free.

It was after Woodstock, but before the end of the Vietnam war.

It was a time of brown rice, vegetables, and yogurt.

Innisfree was a large, two-story farmhouse, with no central heating. I think there was a fireplace in the living room.

I remember walking to Innisfree, but I also recall that my newly bought 1964 Ford Esquire was parked there.

I remember that I was wearing layered clothing, and had on a sleeveless beaver fur vest that I had gotten out of a “free” box in the city.

A local Doberman pinscher must have thought that I was a two-legged beaver, and proceeded to chase me. I ran away in fright, but then remembered I shouldn't, so I slowed down, and so did the dog, and then I continued walking to Innisfree.

I only stayed at Innisfree for one night, and that was enough.

I don't recall where I went after that, but it was probably back to the Bohemian apartment where I had stayed off and on for a number of years.

Joan Bliss and I walked in the mountains one afternoon, but I can't remember if it was before or after our stay at Innisfree. After that, she went her way, and I went mine...strangers on ships passing in the night.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES!

Ships that pass in the night, and speak each other in passing, only a signal shown, and a distant voice in the darkness; So on the ocean of life, we pass and speak one another, only a look and a voice, then darkness again and a silence.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

THE LAKE ISLE OF INNISFREE

By William Butler Yeats

I will arise and go now, and go to Innisfree, 

And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made; 

Nine bean rows will I have there, a hive for the honeybee, 

And live alone in the bee-loud glade.

And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow, 

Dropping from the veils of the morning to where the cricket sings; 

There midnight's all a-glimmer, and noon a purple glow, 

And evening full of the linnet's wings.

I will arise and go now, for always night and day 

I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore; 

While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements gray, 

I hear it in the deep heart's core.

1892

THE DRUNKEN APE

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-6295785/Our-love-bonding-booze-comes-ancient-APES.html

Getting tipsy meant these apes lost their inhibitions and learned to trust each other, which was a key evolutionary advantage. 

Throughout history, the consumption of alcohol may have helped people become more creative, advancing the development of language, art and religion.

This is because alcohol lowers inhibitions and makes people feel more spiritual.

Apes were drinking beer before Brett Kavanaugh got plastered.

Before Jesus was born our simian brethren were imbibing suds.

Before Hemingway or Steinbeck became inebriated and wrote their prose, apes were swigging beer, or at least a fermented liquid that preceded Coors and Budweiser.

But apes were not sufficiently evolved to create Art; they drank beer to get closer to each other.

Beer bonded them.

Beer triggered their brains to produce endorphins.

And

Voila!

Baby apes!

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND BEER

El Paso Rain September 20, 2018

The

sky's

tears

are

falling

down

my

window

pane

With

joy

or

sorrow

I am

not

sure.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND THE FALLING RAIN

THE WOMAN WITH ONE EYE

A woman in dark clothing was playing the piano.

I was in Tuscon, Arizona, almost at the end of my brief hitchhiking adventure, never to hitchhike again.

*

The woman was playing something by Scarlatti.

I liked it, whatever it was called.

She came to the end of it.

She scooted around on the piano bench.

She was stunningly beautiful with one eye missing.

One word came to mind:

Picasso.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND THE WOMAN WITH ONE EYE

VOLCANIC ANGER AND NUTTY AS A FRUITCAKE

NOTE: A hidden microphone recorded the following.

“Yeah, this is Trump.

Where's my damn diet coke?

I asked for it 10 seconds ago.

There's no collusion.

Get Putin on the phone.

I need some immoral support.

Lock her up.

No collusion.

A kingdom for my horse.

So sad.

TREASON!”

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND VOLCANIC ANGER

GIRL WATCHING

I was thirteen or fourteen when I went with grandma Pat to her card games.

I set up chairs and tables.

*

I went to meet girls.

Well, at least to look at them.

Better to have tried and failed than never to have tried at all.

*

I don't know what kind of card games were played.

Maybe pinochle or bridge.

*

The big room was the size of a gymnasium, and was normally used by Holy Rollers to do their rolling around, and whatever else they did, holy or not.

I sure know one thing for sure, they made a loud racket.

I didn't care much for their religious practice.

*

I did all of my looking until it was time to leave.

I was too shy to go up and talk to any of the damsels.

But there was always a next time.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES CARD GAMES AND GIRL WATCHING

ORIGIN OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM

Isaiah 45:12

I made the earth and created man on it; it was my hands that stretched out the heavens, and I commanded all their host.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-6020911/The-oldest-meteorite-4-65m-year-old-space-rock-reveal-secrets-solar-system.html

Some news can really burn you up.

Some old news, however, can be good news.

Not fake news, either.

We get plenty of that kind from Donald Trump, although he is the one who's always ranting and raving about fake news.

*

I wait every day for an explanation of how our solar system came about.

I get nervous waiting for answers.

Maybe this meteorite will do the trick.

Then I can get some sleep.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES OLD NEWS FAKE NEWS AND METEORITES

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF BURGERS

It's a sad day.

The International House of Pancakes is no longer the International House of Pancakes.

The pancakes have been replaced by burgers.

Don't we have enough burgers already?

Whoppers and Big Macs, Whataburgers and Carl's Jr.'s...

America is big, big burger country.

IHOP wasn't going to be left behind.

Forget those pancakes.

More burgers!

IHOB!

Of course, IHOB will still have its pancakes.

Maybe they'll even have hamburger pancakes.

Bon appetit!

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND BURGERS!

LEE HARVEY AND THE CAMEL JOCK

I lived at home my first year of college.

I rode a bus to downtown Denver where I attended my freshman classes at University of Colorado extension.

The second year I left for Boulder.

*

I had done so well my first year that I was given a $500 dollar grant that I didn't need to pay back.

This was 1967.

$500.00 in 1967 had the same buying power as $3,746.57 in 2018.

{SOURCE: DOLLAR TIMES}

*

I went to Boulder to live in a dorm.

I wouldn't know who my roommate was for a few days.

His name was Michael Gould, from San Fernando, California.

He had a girlfriend back in San Fernando.

*

If I was a nerd, then Michael was a jock, easy-going, with a sense of humor.

We got along.

Especially after I wrote a couple of his Freshman English papers.

His English teacher was the wife of my Shakespeare professor.

*

I lived on the ninth floor of what is even to this day the tallest building in Boulder, Colorado.

It was called Williams Village.

Today it's called Stearns Tower.

It's fifteen stories tall.

*

My tution paid for breakfast and dinner.

The food wasn't too bad.

One time at dinner, we were served enchiladas.

I remember I also had jello.

I proceeded to cut up my enchiladas and jello into small pieces.

One of the guys who lived on the same floor as me asked, “Do you cut up everything that you eat?

I replied, “Yes.”

He shook his head, which at this time was dripping wet from all of the hot sauce he had put on his enhiladas.

I forget his name, but he is the tallest man I've ever seen except for the famous Corn King.

He kept a lot of guns in his dorm room's closet.

He sometimes warned other card players when they made him mad that he would go get one of his guns.

I thought that was funny.

The guns' triggers were safety-locked, and he never went to get one.

*

On Saturdays I watched one TV program in the dorm's Recreation Room:

Laugh In.

I didn't smoke or drink.

I never went to any parties.

No wonder I didn't have any friends.

*

Well, I did go to one party.

A beer keg party.

I can't remember who took me to the keg party, or who brought me back to the dorm.

I borrowed one of the dorm's graduate student's John Hopkins pewter mug, and was warned not to lose it.

I'm lucky I didn't lose or forget it.

I was very inebriated when I left the party.

I went crazy when I got into the dorm's elevator...yelling and kicking.

When I finally made it to my room, I turned on the lights, and promptly went to my sleeping roommate and tried to push him off his bed. He sat up and lifted his right arm with a closed fist, ready to sock me, but then

started to laugh.

Lucky for me.

*

I didn't get to know anyone on my floor of the dorm, or for that matter anyone at the university.

Michael and I didn't speak to each other very much.

I spent most of my time in the library away from all social interference.

*

Two of the dorm tenants became known as camel jock and lee harvey.

Camel jock had a moustache, and was from the Middle East.

Lee harvey looked like Lee Harvey Oswald.

I thought both didn't deserve these titles, but they took it all in fun, at least on the outside.

*

Nothing happened that was very exciting, except for the night that the male students snuck into the dorm of the female students, and sprayed their doors with whipping cream.

That was about it.

Then I moved somewhere else.

IT'S ABOUT RENEWABLE RESOURCES AND DORM LIFE