READING BETWEEN THE CABBAGE LINES

April 19, 2008

President Bush Participates in Joint Press Availability with President Lee Myung-Bak of the Republic of Korea
Camp David

[Below is an abbreviated script with Mad Plato’s words between brackets.]

PRESIDENT BUSH:

Welcome. We're glad you're here, Mr. President, and we're glad you brought Mrs. Kim. We had a wonderful dinner last night, and looking forward to having lunch, too, today.

[But, please, no more Kim Chee for me]

We've had great visits. And this is an important visit for me to get to know you. I heard about your background. [And you know mine]. I admire your strength of character, and this is an important visit to strengthen the relationship between our two countries and I believe we have done so.

President Lee is the first Korean President to visit Camp David. And I don't know if the American citizens understand your nickname -- you're known as the "Bulldozer."

[I’m known as the Deceiver…I mean the Decider]

(Laughter.)

I like his spirit, I like his candor, and I like his optimistic vision.

[And I like his wife]

But most of all I really appreciate his values.

Korea has asked to upgrade its foreign military sales status with the United States and to have the same access to U.S. military technologies as NATO and other key allies, and I strongly support this request and have instructed Secretaries Rice and Gates to work with the Congress to get this done.

[Our GNP depends upon the sales of more weapons not fewer]

President Lee and I discussed our mutual concern for the human condition in North Korea.

[Shouldn’t I say the inhumane conditions?]

We are -- our hearts break when we hear these stories of families that have been torn apart or people being subjected to harsh work camps because of their beliefs.

[My Iraq war has given us a lot of untold stories of families that have been torn apart and blown up, and are subjected to harsh conditions because of so little electricity, poor sanitation, meager amounts of food and clean water]

And then of course we talked about our economy.

[What a mess it is]

As a former CEO, President Lee understands the importance of trade. First of all, I want to thank you, Mr. President, and I appreciate your decision to reopen the Korean market to American beef -- consistent with international standards. This is good news for Korean consumers and it's good news for American beef producers. As a matter of fact, we had some good American beef last night for dinner. (Laughter.)

[But I prefer good American Armadillo]

And then finally we talked about our mutual desire to have a rational, practical approach to international climate [Because all nations have climate, I call it international].

So we had a great discussion. Really appreciate you coming. And Mr. President, the podium is yours

[And the opprobrium is mine]

IT'S THE OIL STUPID!